What were them good old boys were drinkin?

Ok so the girls & I were playing their new Band Hero game yesterday on the Wii and one of the songs is "American Pie". I had the mic, so I'm singing...

"Drove my chevy to the levee, but the levee was dry. Them good old boys were drinkin...."

WTF? They left out WHISKEY!!!! You can't sing it "them good old boys were drinkin and rye..." it doesn't make sense! I sang the word, which probably gave me lower points. They are just being politically correct. If there was a copyright problem, the song wouldn't be there.... not in a well known game like that. The artist is listed in the title with the original song playing in the background (with words... just "blanking out" the word whiskey.).

Grrrr. Stupid. The world is going to shit.

You realize there are 26 letters in the alphabet?

Sunday Stealing: The A to Z Meme

A
• Are you available?
For what? To babysit? To design a t-shirt for you? Specifics. Doesn't anyone realize things can be taken in so many ways?
• What is your age?
36
• What annoys you?
Slivers in my fingers

B
• Do you know anyone named Billy?
I've known people named Billy. Past people.
• When is your birthday?
in December. I like daisies.
• Who is your best friend?
Kimberella is my best friend, but Melissa is my bestest friend. Yes, they are different. It gives Melissa that small upper hand. Nothing against Kimber it's just that Melissa was there first.

C
• What's your favorite candy?
Seriously?
• Crush?
Wasn't this asked a few weeks ago? I still have some of that Grape Crush in the fridge...
• When was the last time you cried?
oh crap, I don't know.

D
• Do you daydream?:
Too often. Then the dog barks or something and snaps me back into my real life.
• What's your favorite kind of dog?
Golden Retriever, especially mine
• What day of the week is it?
It's Saturday. And I'm home again tonight... like I have been the last 150 some Saturdays. Sometimes it sucks being a wife & mom.

E
• How do you like your eggs?
sunny-side up
• Have you ever been in the emergency room?
a couple times. Different reasons.
• Ever pet an elephant?
Yeah, from the top of it.

F
• Do you use fly swatters?
No. The dog catches them.
• Have you ever used a foghorn?
I had to ask someone what that was and no I haven't. Haven't used the rooster either.
• Is there a fan in your room?
on the ceiling

G
• Do you chew gun?
what else do you do with gum?
• Do you like gummy candies?
are we fighting wars against them? Worms vs Bears? Go worms!!!
• Do you like gory movies?
Of course! Love them! Although Hostel was a little too real - that one freaked me out.

H
• How are you?
just fine, how are you? Do you even care because nobody really wants to know the answer to this question when they ask you it.
• What's your height?.
5'5".
• What color is your hair?
today it's light brown - next week, blonde.

I
• What's your favorite ice cream?
chocolate peanut butter
• Have you ever ice skated?
yeah, but mostly on my ass
• Ever been in an igloo?
can't say that I have

Christ on a crutch... we're only on "J"????

J
• What's your favorite Jelly Bean?
the one I'm eating at the time
• Have you ever heard a really hilarious joke?
WTF??? kind of question is this??
• Do you wear jewelry?
rings, belly button ring and earrings. Anything else you wanna know?

K
• Who do you want to kill?
whoever came up with the idea to have 3 questions for every letter of the alphabet.
• Have you ever flown a kite?
Yes. My answers are going to be simple from here on out.
• Do you think kangaroos are cute?
when they are first born they are ugly as hell - they look like a blood clot.

L
• Are you laidback?
Not anymore
• Lions or Tigers?
Leopards.
• Do you like black licorice?
Do you like a hot poker in your eye?

M
• Favorite movie as a kid?
Bambi
• Ever shopped at Moosejaw?
at where?
• Favorite store at the mall?
the ones that aren't in the mall. I hate malls.


N
• Do you have a nickname?
a few
• Whats your favorite number?
oh shut up
• Do you prefer night or day?
day

O
• What's your one wish?
for someone to shorten the alphabet
• Are you an only child?
no
• Do you like the color orange?
sure.

P
• What are you most paranoid about?
doing next week's meme
• Piercings?
I went through this already
• Do you know anyone named Penelope?
no

Q
• Are you quick to judge people?
usually
• Do you like Quaker Oats?
no
• Know anyone that makes quilts?
yes
• Do you think you're always right?
no because I'm usually wrong
• Do you watch reality TV?
not if I can help it
• Reason to cry?
I'll give you 3 guesses and the first 2 don't count.

S
• Do you prefer sun or rain?
sun
• Do you like snow?
only on Christmas morning
• What's your favorite season?
spring

T
• time is it?
time to type faster
• What time did you wake up?
today or March 13th 1997?

U
• Can you ride a unicycle?
I don't know, never tried
• Do you know anyone with a unibrow?
I think so
• Uncles do you have?
Love the grammer.

V
• What’s the worst vegetable?
asparagus
• Did you ever watch Veggie Tales?
no
• Ever considered being vegan?
are you kidding me? There's a reason we learned to hunt.

W
• What's your worst habit?
doing Sunday Stealing. Ok maybe not, but if feels like it right now.
• Do you like water rides?
No. I hate it when my swimsuit goes up my butt
• Ever been inside a windmill?
you can go in them?

X
• Have you ever had an x-ray?
yes
• Ever used a Xerox machine?
oh shut up. Please. Or shoot me.

Y
• Do you like the color yellow?
Yes.
• What year were you born in?:
2 years into the 70s
• Do you yell when you're angry?
yes... can't you hear me?

Z
• Do you believe in the zodiac?
the killer?
• What's your zodiac sign?
that half man half horse freak.
• When was the last time you went to the zoo?
last summer. I'm due for another trip there.

Thank God I'm done with THAT! Less questions next week, guys. Holy crap.

I often wonder....

.....why is "California blend" vegtables called that? It's not like broccoli, cauliflower and carrots are only grown in California. Or maybe it was someone in Cali who thought it'd be good to put the 3 together? '

Peanut Allergies... makes sense

I was flipping through channels on the tv this afternoon and came across a show with a child who has severe peanut allergies and I just rolled my eyes. I'm one of those people that just doesn't get it... why the sudden increase in peanut allergies? So I googled it. I have to admit, I'm not really shocked at what I found:

Experts who are looking at why allergies appear to be on the rise have come up with a number of theories - for example that we have all become too clean.

Clean water, antibiotics and vaccines have eliminated many of the most toxic challenges which the immune system is designed to fight such as parasites, viruses and infections, so the immune system finds something else to battle such as eggs, wheat or some other innocuous food.

It has also been suggested that children born by Caesarean section, which have risen 40 percent in the last decade, could be at higher risk for allergies, perhaps because their bodies are never exposed to the healthy bacteria in their mothers' birth canals.

But much of this is no more than speculation and while scientists may have a basic understanding of how allergies occur, the complex immune system remains in many respects a puzzle.

Novel approaches are being tried with some success where the offending ingredients are introduced in tiny amounts to see if they can treat, cure or even prevent food allergies from developing in the first place.

The hope is to ultimately come up with a peanut-allergy vaccine.

There are pages upon pages with the same theory - from scientists and doctors. It makes fricken sense. I look at too many parents these days who wash their kids toys, don't let them eat candy out of the dirt and have them wash their hands so many times a day they have rough skin. I don't have anything against hand washing or washing things in general, but lay off a little bit! Those germs are HELPING, not harming.

Demon #2 was a pacifier addict until she was 2 1/2. I couldn't count how many times it dropped on the ground, in the dirt and she picked it up and stuck it in her mouth. And if it was that dirty, I cleaned it off with my own spit and dried it off with my shirt.

The thing that pissed me off the most is that instead of telling these parents to chill the hell out, they are working on yet another vaccine to stick into kids? I laughed at my doctor when he asked if I wanted the demons to get the chicken pox vaccine. Oh, they got it eventually... the natural one. The one that they got from a friend, the one that made them itch and scratch and look like a connect the dot book. Thats the one I gave them. And when they get a cold or the flu? They lay their butts on the couch and let it ride out. I've heard so often "are you taking them to the doctor". Heck with that. I don't want their bodies to be so pumped full of antibiotics that they can't fight off a pimple.

I can say that I'm lucky that I haven't had any serious illnesses with the demons, outside of their hypothyroidism & the occasional psoriasis outbreak, but I don't think it's luck. I think we've made that happen by buying a bottle of NyQuil instead of dropping a co-pay for some antibiotic. We don't have anit-bactrial soap in the house, we wash our hands when we have to, we eat off of each others plates and the dogs kiss us on the lips. We're all healthy, get sick rarely and we sit back and shake our heads at these over-protective, germ fighting, paranoid parents who think that if their child breaths the same air that another child breaths it's going to kill them. And we all stick our fingers in the peanut butter jar.

Yep, we are a peanut butter addicted house. And my kids have been eating peanut butter since before they were walking.

Lighten up, thats all I say. Let your kids get dirty, keep them out of the doctors office (do you know how many fricken sicknesses are in that waiting room?) and let your kids get sick - and get over it - by themselves. I haven't encountered a cold that chicken noodle soup didn't cure.

... and thats my rant for the day.

Katherine LaFuze is a fraud

A dear, sweet friend of mine, Lesley, who probably doesn't even swat flies because she's so nice, found out some creepy news the other day... here is what she posted on her blog today. This is just fucked up. Excuse the language, but I can't say it any nicer.

Katherine LaFuze is a fraud

Update on the photo thief. Katherine LaFuze stole all my photos from my webshots account. I have since deleted them. She created a life using my photos. Husband (noname?) Daughters Gabrielle and Chloe which one of them is sick. I believe she's trying to get donations from unknowing sympathetic internet friends.

The whole thing is so stupid. It's crazy weird that there are people out there that associate MY photos with her crazy life! She's submitted them in hundreds of contests.. I coudln't even track them all.

Here profile: http://www.facebook.com/people/Katherine-LaFuze/1213166201
Allison was like 6 mos there? Maybe younger?

Here's one of the groups she's in. http://www.new.facebook.com/group.php?gid=21054274390
where she's apprantly pregnant w/ child no. 3. A boy! I could have guessed that!

Anyway....a friend of mine started the "Katherine LaFuze is a FRAUD" group. :) hehe Hopefully it's not up long cuz I want this lady gone

Lesley also has a little boy named Tyler... that is why she is not surprised Katherine is pregnant with a boy. I'm sure she was planning on using Tyler's pictures for her new bundle of lies.

I'm just helping getting the word out.. this woman IS GETTING MONEY because of this. She's claiming one of her kids is sick.

Flying Hamsters

So I'm sitting here bored out of my mind. I don't know whats up, but it seems like everyone who is a member on InsanityCafe has either had their tongue ripped out by a madman or had their fingers cut off by some wicked doctor who plans on doing finger transplants because nobody is fricken talking on there today. I've played so many games of Hamster Flight I feel like a flying hamster on a mission for rockets with fire coming out of them. It's crazy. I'm going to dream I'm in a hamster ball tonight, I swear.

I am just in shock that it's already December. I just don't understand where this year went. It's going to be 2009... do you remember how we all were so nervous about the coming of 2000? That didn't seem like that long ago, but yet it's a year short of a decade.

I snuck Demon #2 a benedryl tonight. Flame me with your comments, I don't give a rats ass. Until you've lived with this child, shut up. I couldn't take it anymore. Even she mentioned she's more hyper than normal. Good God. I really need to get her in to get her TSH levels checked again because even she is wondering if her thyroid isn't whacked out. I hope it's the case because her next stop is either boot camp or a foster home. Or a circus. Something. She's a difficult child to deal with and usually I have no troubles at all (the husband on the other hand... well, when you fall from the same tree, watch out! Those two are like oil & water). The past couple days I'm ready to just string her up by her toenails and duct tape her to the ceiling. Lord, tell me it's just a phase. She's got 3 months before she officially becomes a teenager... I just don't think it can get much worse.

But then again, Demon #1 spends her waking moments walking around with a permanant frown on her face. No, not a frown - a pissed off at any one of the adult persuasion look. She whines and argues and ... ok, I admit it. Demon #2 is looking like an angel now.

Its gonna be random

I feel like blogging, but I really have nothing to blog about so I'm just gonna start typing and see where this goes. Maybe it won't go anywhere and this will be a waste of your time to read, who knows.
So yesterday I made our Christmas cards, then I wrote our yearly "letter" to send with it. I'm sitting there and realized that nothing exciting had happened to us in 2008 except for getting Saki. Which probably is ok, it's better than something huge & horrible happening. Knock on wood, of course, because 2008 isn't finished yet.
My brother, Patrick, is a member on IC Forums... actually he's the brains behind it. There wouldn't be a forum to post on if it wasn't for him. Anyway, the other day he posted about a Motrin ad that was created & run that sent a whole bunch of sling-baby-wearing moms into an uproar. I had to laugh.. I never "wore" my babies and not that I have anything against it or anything but I think Motrin was thinking when they created that ad! Wearing your baby any way, even just with your arms, is pain. Plain and simple. And there is not a mother out there who can tell me differently. Motherhood causes headaches, backaches, stomachaches and everything else in between. It comes with the territory. And if you tell me it doesn't, I've got 2 perfectly behaved, non-emotional teenagers to sell you. I think Motrin should point there ad at me! The baby years are easy... just wait until your precious cooing bundles of joy turn into back-talking, mood swinging, hormonal, hate-you-then-love-you teenagers. You don't know the pain of a migraine until you've gotten past those terrible twos.
But yet, even though my demons hate me after I tell them to take out the garbage or that they need to clean their room... I still just had to get them both a puffle from ToysRUs yesterday because... well, I'm a mom and even though they cause me pain, I forget about it when I think of how happy they will be when I give them their "for no reason present". (A "puffle" is a character on Club Penguin. If your kids haven't discovered Club Penguin yet... let them. It's a great site. Very safe, very monitored.)
I've been sick for almost a week... I wish one of the demons would have given me a "for no reason present" of doing the dishes at least once this past week. Never happened. Oh well. The pain of being a mom. They have clean clothes, clean dishes and blueberry muffins in their tummies, but I am still sick.
Baby wearing moms.... just wait. You ain't felt the pain that Motrin can't relieve.
Wow. I really went off on that, now didn't I? Just strikes a cord with me. Perfect little mommies. They all live in a dreamworld.
Hmmm now I don't have anything else to say. Chico is barking at God knows what. Probably the wind or something stupid. I swear that he must have some sort of anxiety disorder. He's always scared of something and tries to act like a big dog and bark. I tell him that nobody is afraid of a dustmop, but he just keeps going.
Hey.... dustmops. I finally got one of those Swiffer WetJets this weekend. The jury is still out if I like it or not. Seems to leave streaks on my living room floor (it's got a wood floor - or those knock-off wood floors I suppose you could call it). Seems to pick up a lot of stuff though. Either that or my floor was just that dirty. It is that time of year... wet, muddy, dogs drag their muddy paws across my floors.
Anyone ever use those Frebreeze candles? Holy cow, do they throw off their scent! It's got to be the strongest smelling candle to date. Love them. Sometimes its too much, but it makes the whole house smell good - not just the 4 foot circumfrance of the candle.
You still reading?? I have days like this where I just want to type about nothing in particular. Today is one of those days. I really should get my ass in gear and go do my errands and visit my parents but I have no ambition. And my weatherbug says its 19 degrees outside. Brrrrcity, as Kimber would say.
Ok I guess I'm done. Don't know if it was worth reading or not, but it got my blogging out of my system for the time being.

I'm adding the Motrin video. Seems even the cached page of it doesn't work. Tell me what you think? Think Motrin went too far? You already know my opinion....

I'm not dead... yet

Just want to let everyone know that I haven't been a lazy blogger for no reason than being lazy. I got a heck of a cold (thanks sis) this week and it's in my chest/throat and it makes my body hurt all over.

So I've just been sick. Thats my excuse.

I have gotten 2 different awards from 2 different people this week that I have to put up/pass on and I just haven't had the ambition. I'll do it... and thank you.

Video games are ruining our kids...

So CNN reports this morning that violent video games are linked to child aggression.

About 90 percent of U.S. kids ages 8 to 16 play video games, and they spend about 13 hours a week doing so (more if you're a boy). Now a new study suggests virtual violence in these games may make kids more aggressive in real life.

My first thought? Why aren't the 30-somethings walking around with a hatred for ducks? I would think that Duck Hunt could ruin anyone's mood... ok, so maybe we don't have a hatred for ducks, but I know a few people who wanted more than anything to kill that fricken laughing dog!!!
Why can't people just open up their eyes and see what the real problem is? It's us. Plain and simple. Turn on the news... there is more violence in that 1/2 hour of TV than 12 hours of video games. And lets see - the news is REAL, video games are fake. I think even kids can figure that one out.
Let's stop wanting the big bucks cars, houses, boats, diamonds and all that other fancy shit and stop and pay attention to our kids once and awhile. That might just help a tad bit.

Wanna know why kids are aggressive? Because they are pissed off that they were brought into this world by two people that don't spend more than 2 hours of waking time at home.

On the subject of video games, I've recently been explained something that made far too much sense. Are video games all that bad for kids? Is limiting their computer time to an hour a day really smart? Look around - what does our world consist of? Computers. Technology. It's a sad fact - maybe not so sad - but those kids who are sheltered from computers, video games and the like are going to step into the world as an adult and not understand a fricken thing that's going on. And, not to mention, jobs. What kind of good paying job doesn't have something to do with computers? I'm not saying sit your kids in front of the stuff for 18 hours a day, but have you ever noticed how much these kids are learning?

It's not the world we grew up in, people. It's time for us to just adjust to that. We can't raise our kids the way we were raised. It's just a fact.

Halloween, football and why I'll never be president

Halloween went better than I expected. Our high school football team was at the semi-finals out of town last night so everyone figured that, no pun intended, that this town would be a ghost town. We had quite a few kids, it was fun. A friend of ours who I used to work with pulled up in his hearse for his yearly drive through town dressed up as the Grim Reaper. Gotta love him.

Our team got their ass kicked. We usually have these obnoxious scores of 64-0 or something stupid like that and they sulked away with a 30-0 loss. To quote this mornings news:

“They just seem to go to the state tournament every year,” said New London-Spicer fullback Taylor Dammermann of the Huskies, who have been to state 18 times since 1974.

See? I love my high school and all that, but these constant trips to the prep bowls gets old.....

And I decided this morning that I will never run for president of the United States. Sorry to disappoint you all, but I'd be screwed. I've spent the last few weeks listening to all of these people (ok I'm not just talking about the presidential candidates here) apologizing for things that they said that somehow or another were taken out of context. Or not apologizing, whatever. Like McCain and his "that one" comment. I honestly didn't even catch any offensiveness when I heard him say it and I still think it's the stupidest thing to make headlines and end up on t-shirts all over the country. I'd say something stupid the first day of my campaign, I know I would. I say stupid things at least 10 times a day. Sometimes just to the dogs or the cats and I'm sure they are offended, but luckily they can't tell me they are and thankfully, if I ever did run for a position, they can't dial the phone and tell people the stupid things I've said.
With the end in sight I hope everyone has made up their minds by Tuesday. I don't know how they can - there is so much mudslinging going on that both of the candidates look like complete assholes. I'm just voting for who the majority of my family is voting for. At least they told me good things about the dude.
And then... we have these states who have this electronic voting machines problem. Votes being switched, votes not being counted. WTF? I head some guy say on some news station last night that we can stick a card in an ATM and get cash and our bank knows exactly how much we took out, we can buy a lottery ticket and not have that messed up but the government can't figure out a voting machine? I think it's time to go back to the old fashioned "check here if you wish to vote for this person". Lets hope it's not another year of a 6 year wait to see who will win.

I'm sure it will be a close race, so I could see it happening.

And today the husband is headed out to sight in the gun he's using next weekend for deer hunting. And do a bunch of other stuff, too I guess. He'll be gone for 10 days.... that's gonna be strange. Well, less than that if they get their limit of deer. That'd be sweet. I want a freezer full of venison hamburger when this is all said and done! Num Yummy.

Drunken Headaches and 14 year olds

I just told Demon #2 oops. Kimber corrected me.... it's a story about Demon #1

Lets start over. I just told Demon #1 (who remember is 14) that her dad & I were going to go out and get drunk tonight. We aren't, but thats besides the point. Actually, she doesn't believe me because we never do so she basically laughed at me. Then she said I couldn't because I wasn't 21.

(Love her)

"If I wasn't 21 yet, you wouldn't be born yet."

"You were 21 when I was born?"

"Yeah, I was 21 when I got pregnant with you... no wait... it was 2 weeks after my 21st birthday."

(she laughs) "2 weeks after?"

"Yeah, which is a good thing because then you would have been an alcohol baby"

"You drank on your 21st birthday?"

"Yeah, because thats what you do when you turn 21."

"So when I turn 21 I should get drunk?"

"Yes and not before."

"So I should drink and get drunk and have a headache the next day? Thats silly."

and she walked away.

*cue the look of disbelief that I actually taught my kid something good*

Online divorcee jailed after killing virtual hubby

This one takes the cake...

TOKYO: A 43-year-old Japanese woman whose sudden divorce in a virtual game world made her so angry that she killed her online husband's digital persona has been arrested on suspicion of hacking, police said Thursday.

The woman, who is jailed on suspicion of illegally accessing a computer and manipulating electronic data, used his identification and password to log onto popular interactive game "Maple Story" to carry out the virtual murder in mid-May, a police official in northern Sapporo said on condition of anonymity, citing department policy.

"I was suddenly divorced, without a word of warning. That made me so angry," the official quoted her as telling investigators and admitting the allegations.

The woman had not plotted any revenge in the real world, the official said.

She has not yet been formally charged, but if convicted could face a prison term of up to five years or a fine up to $5,000.

Players in "Maple Story" raise and manipulate digital images called "avatars" that represent themselves, while engaging in relationships, social activities and fighting against monsters and other obstacles.

The woman used login information she got from the 33-year-old office worker when their characters were happily married, and killed the character. The man complained to police when he discovered that his beloved online avatar was dead.

This is nuts. I mean, was he heartbroken? Is he in mourning?

if you don't believe me....

Stinky farts & blood pressure? Who studies this stuff?

The stink in farts controls blood pressure.... so they say.

A smelly rotten-egg gas in farts controls blood pressure in mice, a new study finds.

The unpleasant aroma of the gas, called hydrogen sulfide (H2S), can be a little too familiar, as it is expelled by bacteria living in the human colon and eventually makes its way, well, out.

The new research found that cells lining mice's blood vessels naturally make the gas and this action can help keep the rodents' blood pressure low by relaxing the blood vessels to prevent hypertension (high blood pressure). This gas is "no doubt" produced in cells lining human blood vessels too, the researchers said.

"Now that we know hydrogen sulfide's role in regulating blood pressure, it may be possible to design drug therapies that enhance its formation as an alternative to the current methods of treatment for hypertension," said Johns Hopkins neuroscientist Solomon H. Snyder, M.D., a co-author of the study detailed in the Oct. 24th issue of the journal Science.

Snyder and his colleagues compared normal mice to mice that were missing a gene for an enzyme known as CSE, long suspected as being responsible for making hydrogen sulfide. As they measured hydrogen sulfide levels taken from tissues of the CSE-deficient mice, the scientists found that the gas was depleted in the cardiovascular systems of the altered mice. By contrast, normal mice had higher levels of the gas, thereby showing that hydrogen sulfide is naturally made by mammalian tissues using CSE.

Next, the mice were subjected to higher blood pressures comparable to serious hypertension in humans. Scientists had them respond to a chemical called methacholine that relaxes normal blood vessels. The blood vessels of the CSE-lacking mice hardly relaxed, indicating that hydrogen sulfide is a huge contender for regulating blood pressure.

Hydrogen sulfide is the most recently discovered member of a family of gasotransmitters, small molecules inside our bodies with important physiological functions.

This study is the first to reveal that the CSE enzyme that triggers hydrogen sulfide is activated itself in the same way as other enzymes when they trigger their respective gasotransmitter, such as a nitric oxide-forming enzyme that also regulates blood pressure, Dr. Snyder said.

Because gasotransmitters are common in mammals all over the evolutionary tree, these findings on the importance of hydrogen sulfide are thought to have broad applications to human diseases, such as diabetes and neurodegenerative diseases.

The research was supported by grants from the U.S. Public Health Service and the Canadian Institutes of Health Research as well as a Research Scientist Award.

Between the husband and Demon #2, I guess this explains why I have such great blood pressure.

I wanna know who actually decided to study this.

What does time mean?

A friend of mine that I went to high school with & I had this bright idea that we were going to plan the upcoming 20th class reunion. Thats another post, but we have 3 years to do it.

3 years.

Long time, right?

Last night I was thinking about this and then it hit me... in 3 years Demon #1 will be 17 years old and a Junior in high school. Demon #2 will be 15 years old and a Sophomore in high school. She's going to be the age we all were when we grew up... the whole class reuinion...

OMG I'm going to pass out.

Then I think about my friend who mentioned to me yesterday something about her kid and Kindergarten. Now, to me, Kindergarten to 3rd grade isn't that big of a stretch. They are still little! And yeah, I know, I've gone through it. I'd probably have a panic attack about the 3rd grade thing if I was in her shoes. But 11th grade? That seems so far away... this is my little girl, the one who is just blossoming into a woman..... and who has the hormones and mood swings of a Queen Bitch from Hell (hence the whole demon spawn thing... I tell ya, I called it when I was pregnant.). I cannot imagine her in 11th grade.. having boyfriends... driving (Lord, allow your light to shine upon me)... figuring out if it's marine biology or meteorology she's going to go after. This just isn't right.

Not in 3 years. That's a lifetime away.

.... isn't it?




....................
This post gave me an idea for a new design! At least my wacked out thoughts are good for something.

How to wash your... um... yeah.

So yesterday Kimber wanted to know if anyone on IC Forums had used a bidet.

That word is so wierd. It's not even pronounced anywhere near how it's spelled! And they wonder why the English language is so hard to learn.

Anyway, she shared this link. A How-To on how to use one of these things. Who comes up with this stuff? Here is a list of the "warnings" listed.

Be very careful when turning on the water, as many bidets can produce a very high jet of water with only a slight turn of the control.

This just sent me into a rolling laugh... seriously.

Dry wipe at least once after having a bowel movement and before using the bidet. Excess fecal matter may clog the bidet drain. This can be quite disgusting for someone who uses the bidet after you.

eeeeeeewwwwwww and if you are going to dry wipe once.. why not just finish the job?

Be very careful adjusting the temperature and pressure on the bidet. You want to avoid scalding sensitive skin, and high pressure can be very irritating.

or thrilling....

Drinking from a bidet is not recommended. The stream can ricochet off a soiled area and become contaminated.

Yeah because washing your ass makes you thirsty.

I'm thinking that the experience of actually using one of these would be so fun & comical that it would be a shame to experience it alone. This is something to share with friends!

It's a Sunday

I'm sitting here watching the clock tick down until the girls leave for PopTalk/Confirmation Class so I can jump in the shower and get myself ready for church.

Parents have to go to church as a requirement starting this year. Parents should go to church with their children, it's only common sense, but this year the parents have to answer questions - just like the students - about the church service/sermon. I don't know how I feel about that.

Yeah I do. I don't like it. I don't like being told that I HAVE to go to church every Sunday and I sure don't like having "homework" attached to it. While you are in confirmation classes, sure... makes sense. But why the parents? It takes a lot away from the reason you are going to church in the first place, IMO.

I left the Catholic church because of their rules and I fell in love with the Lutheran church because of the laid back, welcoming feel when you walk in the door. I never felt welcomed at a Catholic church like I do at ours. But now? Now all of a sudden there is this obligation attached to going and I don't like that. I want to go because I want to go... not because someone tells me I have to go so I can answer questions so my children can be confirmed.

I just think it's wrong. It's like having to pass some graduation test so my child can graduate from high school.

Ketchup Sex

What does your fridge contain? If it's anything like mine it has a wonderful collection of many different sizes, shapes and flavors of food. 3 kinds of mustard, 8 kinds of salad dressing, Miracle Whip and mayonnaise, 3 different kinds of juice, tons of leftovers that nobody ever wants to touch (why do I bother keeping cooked carrots anyway).... and 2 bottles of ketchup.

I feel for those with more mouths in their house than I have. With 4 different sets of taste buds in this house we have enough variety to please anyone.

I cut up some cantelope today and went to put the bowl in the fridge. If you are a mom you understand that simply putting something away can take anywhere from 10 seconds to an hour. Move this, throw away that, clean this.

I skipped the throwing away part today because I was not in the mood for the scent testing of refrigerator science experiments. Maybe tomorrow. One is made with sour cream - I'm just not in the mood.

Somehow we always seem to manage to accumulate 2 different bottles of opened ketchup in our fridge. I don't know how, don't know why. I'm not sure if someone sees a bottle in the cupboard and just figures it's too warm and needs to go into some air conditioning. I don't know.

I did move some thing and clean ..... ok, I lied. I didn't clean a damn thing. But I did find the 2 bottles of ketchup which are now having... guess you would call it intercourse. That must be it because the bigger bottle is on top.

We will be back down to one bottle of ketchup once again.

I have no food to feed you today.

I had the strangest dream the other night that I fell asleep in the living room and when I woke up I could see into the kitchen that the refrigerator door was open so I asked one of the girls to go close it. Then awhile later it was open again, so I got pissed off because, well, you know... if you want something done, you have to do it yourself. So I went into the kitchen and the fridge door was hanging wide open and the fridge was.... empty! Someone had come in and stole ALL OF OUR FOOD!

It was weird.

Land of the Lost movie?

Be serious. Are writers having that hard of a time coming up with new ideas that they have to take old shows and try to redo them? I have gotten over the horrible remake of the Dukes of Hazzard... sort of. I still get angry when I see the movie.... that was just one show that shouldn't be made fun of. Not that one.

Anyway, so now they are doing The Land of the Lost. A lot of people either 1. never seen the original 70's version of the show 2. don't remember it or 3. saw it, remember it and won't admit to it. I saw it, loved it and still have nightmares about it. Looking back at the show now, it was horrible - the acting sucked and the special effects were laughable. I tried to get Demon #1 & #2 to watch it one day and they couldn't believe we watched stuff like that as a kid. I think one of them said something to the effect of "wasn't there anything good on when you were a kid?", but that WAS good. For the 70's anyway. The show rocked.

Don't redo it, WTF are you people thinking? Come up with new movies - leave the classics alone! The worst part about it all is that Will Farrell is playing Rick Marshall. That just makes my skin crawl. Land of the Lost was NOT a comedy. It had its humor, but it wasn't a comedy.

If they ever redo the Buggaloos or Sigmund, all of my childhood memories will be crushed.

No parents on leashes!

I know this is going to be the silliest gripe ever, but here goes:

When I was a kid, I didn't want anything to do with my parents. I didn't want to be associated with them, nothing. Then, summer vacations came and mine consisted of running around town with friends. We didn't care where... we just went. Good times.

Now lets fast forward to now. My kids. I swear to God I didn't drop them on their heads as babies... maybe Trucker did, but I didn't. Whats wrong with them?

Saturday, as I've mentioned, was our town's festival... my kids only went uptown (which is 3 blocks away) when I went. I tried giving them money to go buy food, play games, whatever.. other family members tried.. they wouldn't go!

Sunday a church here in town had their bazaar. Trucker & I took the girls. We had to basically force them to play games. They didn't want to leave our sides. We PUSHED them towards the games and told them we'd be over sitting on a bench.

"You are going to ditch us!"

WHAT? Our kids are worried about us ditching them?!!?!? We walked up there.... it's not like they would be stranded or anything. They knew the way home.

There are kids running all over that place with no parents on leashes...why are our kids like this? On the way home we ran into Taryn's bff & her little sister. "Look Taryn! There's Kari and she's going somewhere without her mommy!"

Yeah, I know, sarcasm isn't the best way to talk to your kids, but I'm at my wits end here....

So now it's the week and yesterday I threatened that I was going to ground them FROM THE HOUSE. Go... go do something. Go bowling, go play in the arcade, go to the park, go find a friend, go to the Dairy Queen, go to the library... whatever! I even threw money at them!! Taryn has like 4 friends who live within walking distance... she didn't want to call them. "They are probably busy".

I know, I know, I should be happy that my kids stick at home instead of running around all over town doing things that I have no clue what they are doing, but I still just want them to at least... just once a week.... go be kids! This has how it's been all fricken summer long. I could understand if I wasn't always home with them, but you would think they would get sick of me. They are with me 24/7. I'm just asking for an hour...