I'm a good mom. I taught my children that lying is bad early in their life. At least I thought I did.
Last night during a commercial break of House I told Demon #1 to pick up the junk that was in front of the entertainment center. (Or 'tainment center, as she calls it - even at 13 years old) The junk consisted of a book, a sock, 2 pieces of paper and 1 knee pad. She put the book on the 'tainment center, the sock on the couch and actually walked to the garbage can in the kitchen to throw the papers away. I was beaming with pride over that one.
Then comes the knee pad.
She walks to the front door to the entry way and walks in... walks out.
"Did you just throw that on the bench?"
We finished watching House and then went to bed.
This morning I go out into the entry way to have a cigarette. It's a closed entry way/porch, so don't freak out that I smoke in the house. I don't. I'm just not standing outside.
What do I find when I sit down on the bench? The knee pad. What was the pride I felt last night? So I wake Demon #1 up for school this morning with "Good Morning, you're grounded" and I walk out of her bedroom.
If that won't get a teenager out of bed quick.
I proceeded to tell her as she's falling out of bed, stumbling out her bedroom door whining "Why? Mom! What did I do?" that I taught her not to lie and she lied to me. She's grounded through the weekend. She argued with me saying that is the stupidest reason to be grounded, it's just a knee pad. I asked her if she had prom this weekend and, of course, that just irritated her because she knows I know she's only in 7th grade and 7th graders don't have prom. 7th graders don't really have a social life anyway so I know that she knows that I know I didn't ruin any life altering events.
I laugh at my Demons. And I tell them why. I asked her why she would lie about something that she knew I would find out about the next time I walked into the porch. "If you are going to lie, at least try not to get caught". Yeah, probably not the smartest thing to try to teach your child, but so far it hasn't mattered if a 13 year old is going to lie about something stupid like a knee pad.
So friends, here's the moral of the story. If you don't want to do what your mom says, at least stuff the knee pad under the cushion of the bench, just don't lay it on top in plain view. It just might save your ass from going to prom.